Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Of Little Home and Lovely Mom

Bismillah.

Life is beautiful in it's own unique way isn't it? Some things that people think can cause happiness, are usually the source of problems and sadness. On the other hand, there are times where we think certain people aren't happy due to the low-economy status that they have, but in reality they are happier than thousands of rich people on this Earth.

Too many real-events had proved to us that happiness is something that comes from inside, and obviously materials aren't the reasons of its existence.

I can still remember clearly those days of ours (me and my siblings) where we were genuinely very happy and satisfied with life, although at that time we lived in a small house, with too many damages and cracks. The house wasn't in a perfect condition, but Alhamdulillah it was comfortable enough for us.

Believe it or not, but each time me and my sister reminisce about our childhood, we will always end up laughing very hard when the topic about our home back then enters the conversation. It was so funny to think that we were once lived joyously in a home with a roof which will 'fly' and fold itself whenever strong wind strikes. And it becomes more hilarious when we talk about the angry washing machine, as well as the 'environmental friendly' kitchen wall of that humble house of ours.



Well, I just wanna say that although we didn't live in a big cozy house, we did enjoy our lives to the fullest, and my siblings will agree with me if I say that the memory captured in that house, is definitely the best and sweetest childhood memory that we had. We played, fought, cried, fall, and did everything together. We didn't have much friends in that neighbourhood, but it was never an issue for us.

And one more thing, I think we led a gleeful days back then because we had our mum 24/7 with us. (My mum is a full time at home mother). Who cares if we didn't get to play computer games or iPad like today's kids? We have the best companion ever; our mum. Who cares if we didn't get to eat luxurious food every day? We have our mother's hand to cook and feed us. Who cares if we didn't sleep on a soft and pillowy bed? We have our mother's lap and voice to sing us to sleep. Life is really a heaven when you know that you always have your mother with you, to care about you and to be your best friend ever.

Abu Hurairah (radi Allahu anhu) reported that a person came to the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) and asked: “Who among people is the most deserving of my fine treatment?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied: “Your mother.” He then asked, “Who next?” The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied: “Your mother.” He asked again: “Who next?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said again, “Your mother.” He again asked, “Then who?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “Your father.” [Sahih Bukhari]
Well, happiness isn't about money.

Money isn't everything.

Family is everything.




p.s.: I miss my brothers and sisters! <3

Monday, April 8, 2013

Permulaannya Sahaja yang Sulit

Bismillah.

Ada yang kongsikan artikel "Hiburan Bagi yang Mendapatkan Musibah" di facebook. Saya rasa terhibur dengan ayat-ayat dalam penulisan itu. Satu bahagian yang saya sangat tertarik ketika membacanya, dan rasa terubat sedih:

Musibah Awalnya Saja Terasa Sulit, Namun Jika Bersabar Akan Semakin Mudah  
Hudzaifah ibnul Yaman mengatakan, 
 إِنَّ اللهَ لَمْ يَخْلُقْ شَيْئاً قَطٌّ إِلاَّ صَغِيْراً ثُمَّ يَكْبَرُ، إِلاَّ المصِيْبَة فَإِنَّهُ خَلَقَهَا كَبِيْرَةً ثُمَّ تَصْغُرُ 
“Sesungguhnya Allah tidaklah menciptakan sesuatu melainkan dari yang kecil hingga yang besar kecuali musibah. Adapun musibah, Allah menciptakannya dari keadaan besar kemudian akan menjadi kecil.” (Bahjatul Majalis wa AnsulMajalis, hal. 250)  
Allah menciptakan segala sesuatu, misalkan dalam penciptaan manusia melalui tahapan dari kecil hingga beranjak dewasa (besar)semacam dalam firman Allah, 
 هُوَ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُمْ مِنْ تُرَابٍ ثُمَّ مِنْنُطْفَةٍ ثُمَّ مِنْ عَلَقَةٍ ثُمَّ يُخْرِجُكُمْ طِفْلًا ثُمَّ لِتَبْلُغُواأَشُدَّكُمْ ثُمَّ لِتَكُونُوا شُيُوخًا  
“Dia-lah yang menciptakan kamu dari tanah kemudian dari setetes mani, sesudah itu dari segumpal darah, kemudian dilahirkannya kamu sebagai seorang anak, kemudian (kamu dibiarkan hidup) supaya kamu sampai kepada masa(dewasa), kemudian (dibiarkan kamu hidup lagi) sampai tua.” (QS. Ghofir: 67)  
Namun untuk musibah tidaklah demikian. Musibah datang dalam keadaan besar, yakni terasa berat. Akan tetapi, lambat laut akan menjadi ringan jika seseorang mau bersabar.

Bersabarlah. Dan mintalah pertolongan dari Dia.




p.s.: Artikel penuh di sini.

Arabic Language is Beautiful.

Bismillah.

So here are the Arabic sentences that I wanna share. These are sentences meant for female since my baby is a girl.

1. Let me change your diaper. 
دعيني أُبَدّل لكِ الحفاضة 

2. You poop?
هل تُريدين أن تتبرزّي 
**But when it comes too poop we say in general: هل تُريد الذهاب إلى الحمّام؟
Its more common**

3. Go take your milk bottle. 
خُذي زُجَاجة الحليب 

4. Hold it properly please. 
أمْسِكي بعناية 

5. Be careful.
كُوني حَذِرَة 

6. You’ll get wet.
سَوْف تبتلّي 

7. Put your dirty clothes in the laundry basket
ضعي ثِيَابَكِ المُتّسِخة في سَلّة الغسيل 
**المُتّسِخة meaning الغير نظيفة ** 
For things like (clothes - dishes - carpets -… etc) we use مُتّسخ 
But for human body parts like (mouth - eye - hand -… etc) we use غير نَظيف

8. Come here I breastfeed you. 
تَعالِي لأَرضِعِك 

9. Wave to her please.
لَوِّحي لها 

10. Your mouth is dirty. 
فَمُكِ غير نظيف 

11. I am ironing the clothes.
انا أكوي الملابس

12. Come let me wipe your body and dry your hair.
تعالي أُنشف جسدك و أُجفف شعرك

13. Your diaper is already full.
حفاضتك إمتلأت

14. You need to sleep more/ eat more.
يجب أن تنامي أكثر 
يجب أن تأكلي أكثر

15. Please wait. I am almost finish.
من فضلك إنتظري .. لقد أوشكت على الإنتهاء

16. Can you please stop playing with the slippers?
هل من الممكن أن تتوقفي عن اللعب بالخُف من فضلك؟
هل من الممكن أن تتوقفي عن اللعب بالشبشب من فضلك؟ (slang)

17. The floor is slippery.
الأرض زَلِقة

18. Brush your teeth properly.
فرّشي أسنانك جيداً

19. Wear your shoes/ watch.
إلبسي حذائك
إلبسي ساعتك

20. Tell mama what do you want.
أخبري ماما ماذا تُريدين

21. I want to mop the floor
أنا أُريد أن أمسَح الأرضيّة


22. I am washing the dishes
أنا أغسِل الصُحُون


23. I need to sweep the floor
أنا بِحَاجَة إلى كَنْس الأرضية

24. I need to hang these clothes
أنا بِحاجة إلى تَعليق هذه الملابِس


25. I am folding the clothes
أنا أطْوِي الملابس


26. Don’t step on books
لا تَقِفٍي على الكُتُب 

27. Let me cut your nails
دَعِينِي أُقَلِّم لكِ أظافِرك


28. Help me to clean up the mess please
ساعِديني على تَرتيب هذه الفوضى 


29. Put your books back on the shelf
أعِيدِي كَتُبَكِ إلى الّرف 

30. Please move aside/ make way for me
من فضلِك أفسِحي لي الطريق 

31. Come here, you haven’t wear your clothes yet.
تعالي هنا أنتِ لم تكملي إرتداء ملابسك بعد

32. Help mama to put the toys back inside the box.
ساعدي ماما لوضع الألعاب داخل الصندوق

33. Mama need to clean up the mess first.
ماما ستنظف الفوضى أولا

34. No you cannot write on the wall.
لا .. لا يصحّ الكتابه على الجدار

35. Don’t pour the water on the floor/carpet.
لا تسكبي الماء على الأرض
لا تسكبي الماء على السجادة

36. The shoes are no longer fit with your feet.
الحذاء لا يُناسب قدميك 

37. The food/water is still hot.
ما زال الطعام ساخناً
ما زال الماء ساخناً

38. We’ll wait till it cools down a bit first.
علينا الإنتظار حتى يبرد قليلاً أولا / علينا الإنتظار حتى يهدأ قليلاً أولاً

39. Come here, kiss/hug mama.
تعالي قبّلي ماما / بوسي ماما (slang )
تعالي أحضني ماما 

40. Show mama where do you feel hurt/ where’s the pain. 
أخبريني أين تشعرين بالألم

I'll share more later, in case there's any addition. Insha Allah. 

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Three Languages

Bismillah.

INTRO

A few months ago I managed to finish reading this book: 7 Steps to Raising a Bilingual Child by Naomi Steiner. Before you start reading this entry, I want you to know that I am not going to explain those 7 steps or write every information from that book, instead I am just going to share my journey in teaching my daughter a second/third language, and how this book has helped me in this matter.

Since I was in secondary school, I kept having this one dream: to have children who can speak Arabic. Coz I found it is super cute to see little kids talking (or arguing) in that language. :) However, of course the main actual reason behind that dream is Islam. I know you get what I mean. The author of that book stated that before starting with the bilingualism project, I have to answer why I feel attached to that particular language. (As for me, it's Arabic Language.)

MYTHS AND FACTS

Okay off with that for a while. Let us first see some of the popular myths and facts about bilingualism:

1st myth: If a child is not very intelligent, then he cannot become bilingual. (Fact: A baby's brain is naturally made to learn multiple languages).

2nd myth: A child will become "confused" and mix languages. (Fact: Mixing is a natural step in learning multiple languages.)

3rd myth: A parent must be fluent in more than one language to raise her child bilingual. (Fact: Monolingual parents can raise their child bilingual.)

OUR JOURNEY

Since birth till a few months ago, we talked to our daughter mostly in English. Approximately 70% English, 20% Malay and 10% Arabic. Day by day, I kept saying to myself that it is very crucial for me to start now. I remember the author said: "when it comes to bilingualism, later always means never." Plus, I wanted to start as early as possible because in learning languages, experts generally agree that earlier is better. So at that time, I tried this way: Today is English Day, then tomorrow is Arabic Day, then English day again, and so on so forth. Well, it's not so good. Coz it doesn't seem organized.

To cut a long story short, after I read this book, we tried the one parent one language method (OPOL) which is highly recommended since it is such a successful way to raise a bilingual child. (There are 6 reasons why it is effective, but I am not going to write them down here. But u can request me to list them specially for you). So, by deciding to use this method, my husband chose to use English to talk to her and me, Arabic. (I am not good in speaking Arabic, but the author said that it isn't mandatory for a parent to be fluent in certain language if she wants to teach her child that particular language. Hey, we can learn together with our kids!)

Actually little infants can already differentiate between languages being spoken to her. And as for me, I myself have witnessed it. Before we started using the OPOL method, I noticed that my daughter really knows if the word I use is an Arabic word. Coz everytime I point to something, then I mentioned its name in Arabic, she will immediately say Amin. For example, when I point to a pillow and say wisaadah, she will say Amin! What is that with Amin?!!! Ok, it goes like this, everytime I recite a prayer (which is in Arabic), I will recite it loudly and say Amin after I am done. So when Majdiyya says Amin after I mentioned Arabic word to her, it means that she knows I am using the same language that I use while reciting prayer, and also, it means that she knows it isn't an English word. (Even though it is the first time she hears that particular word)

Actually I have a problem in implementing this OPOL method. Mainly because my husband is a super duper busy man. His time with my daughter is very limited. If she talks with me more than with her dad, she might be late in learning English and her competency in using that language will come later than Arabic. (Since I speak Arabic with her). So I guess it turns out to be: OPTL (one parent two languages- this term isn't available in that book) Finally I read that book, and found a solution; I will still use Arabic as a dominant language in my conversations with my daughter, but I need to find certain activities which I need to use English. So far, the activities that will require me to speak in English are: meal times, reading books time, bath time. The rest, conversations will be conducted in Arabic.

I AM NOT GOOD IN ARABIC

You might say that you are not good in Arabic or English or any other second language, therefore you don't opt for raising a child bilingual. You should know this: monolingual parent can raise a bilingual child. And fluency in certain language is not a prerequisite for you to have the capability to teach your child that language.

I admit that since I have left university for about 3 years, surely it means that I no longer use Arabic in any of my conversations. I have forgotten lots of vocabularies and become very slow if I were to speak or write in that language.

So I seek help from a friend, who is an Arabic native speaker. I list down a few sentences in English, then I ask her to translate them for me. That's how I learn some new words regarding motherhood. I am so happy that in order to teach my baby, I myself will learn something.

I just use simple words, and mostly repeated words! Because everyday's activities are almost the same. ;) Alhamdulillah, even though I am still in the basic level in speaking Arabic, at least I use it in my conversations more than I used it during my degree.

My little problem is I am still shy to use Arabic whenever we are outside our home. :( I am still training myself to be good in Arabic and importantly, to have guts to use it publicly. Well, the author said that one of the methods to be brave to use the second language in public is by letting your friends or family members know that you are using that particular language with your child.

Till today, I still have lots of words that I don't know. So once in a while I will make a list of English sentences and send it to my arabic-native speaker friend, for her to translate them.

BAHASA MELAYU

If any of you meet my daughter, please speak in Malay with her. ;) You are one of the resources that I have in order to teach my daughter Malay language. Well, my baby still will understand Malay because me and my husband are using that language in our conversations. Though my baby might not join our conversations, but still she will slowly understand Malay. Insha Allah.

Apart from that, extended family is also a good Malay language 'teacher' for my baby. Plus, I am not worried much about my daughter can't speak Malay, because she lives in a community where majority of the people she meets or will meet, are Malay native speakers.

Teaching Malay Language is somehow a way to make my daughter feels the sense of belonging. Family gathering is always a good idea and place for your kids to learn your family language. Well, one important thing: don't forget to inform your families that you are raising your kids bilingual. Insha Allah you will get support from them, or at least you won't feel awkward to use the second or third language with your kids, in front of them.

Wallahua'lam.

p.s.: you can request the list of the common phrases used during motherhood (in Arabic) from me. Only a few sentences but will benefit you if you are thinking of starting the bilingualism project!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

No Shoulder to Cry On?

“Sometimes you have no shoulder to 

cry on, but you always have a ground to 

put your head and shed your tears on.”

-anonymous

Friday, March 29, 2013

Lebih Dekat di Hati

Bismillah.

Okay, ni entri pertama bahasa melayu dalam blog ni. Kenapa? Sebab nak cerita sikit tentang isu yang berkaitan bahasa Melayu. (Selama ni biasa guna English bukan sebab pandai berbahasa inggeris sangat, banyak grammatical error, lagi-lagi sejak tinggalkan zaman belajar. Cuma bagi saya, sesuatu entri tu terasa terlebih personal dan mesra kalau saya guna bahasa Melayu. Jadi ada masanya, saya lebih selesa menulis dalam bahasa Inggeris supaya tak terlalu berbaur peribadi. Itu pendapat saya lah.)

Selama ni, ada sesuatu tentang diri saya yg baru saya sedar akan kewujudannya. Saya cepat rasa tak berkenan bila tengok orang Melayu sendiri yang memperlekehkan orang Melayu atau bahasa Melayu (atau drama Melayu). Mengkritik secara membina tu bagus, tapi jadi tak bagus bila mengutuk. Bukan sekali, tetapi berkali-kali dan apa sahaja berkaitan typical Malays, mesti ada saja perkara yang nak dikutuk. Kalau komen disertakan cadangan, itu memang perlu, untuk kebaikan. Tapi kalau sekadar nak luahkan rasa dan mengutuk membanding dengan bahasa lain, merendahkan bahasa sendiri, dalam diam saya rasa agak marah. Atau kadangkala rasa menjengkelkan.


Satu isu yang saya fokuskan, isu novel Melayu. Biasa saya dengar cakap-cakap yg macam ni: "Aku ni tak layan sangat novel Melayu." Dengan nada yg seolah-olah mengatakan tak ada 'standard' kalau suka baca novel dalam bahasa Melayu. Katanya isu dalam buku Melayu sangat klise, tak membina, 'tak habis-habis isu cinta' dan macam-macam lagi.

Wahai yang memberi komen sedemikian, nyata sekali anda memang tak membaca novel Melayu. Kalau anda baca, nescaya anda jumpa kisah-kisah tentang kehidupan realiti, yang bukan sekadar cinta remaja atau cerita-cerita dengan tema serupa. Malah terlalu banyak topik menarik seperti isu ketuhanan, perubatan, sci-fi, psikologi, pemakanan, golongan minoriti dan banyak lagi. Makin menarik kerana cerita-cerita ini dalam bahasa kita. Dalam hidup manusia-manusia yang sama adat dan pertuturannya dengan kita. Kisah-kisah yg berlaku tak jauh dari kita.

Saya baca kedua-duanya; novel Melayu dan novel inggeris. Kedua-dua nya memang ada kekuatan dan kelemahan masing-masing. Cuma bagi saya, apa yg buat saya lebih tertarik untuk baca cerita-cerita yg ditulis dalam bahasa sendiri adalah kerana saya rasa lebih dekat dengan jalan cerita tersebut. Saya banyak belajar tentang sisi-sisi kehidupan masyarakat kita yang selama ni saya tak pernah tahu. Saya makin sedar akan isu-isu yang selama ini tak pernah saya ambil peduli.

Bagi saya membaca buku bukan lah semata-mata tentang cerita mana lebih berkualiti atau jalan cerita mana yang menampakkan kita ini gah ketika membacanya, tapi soal kita memahami setiap kisah dan mengambil manfaat untuk kehidupan kita. Bagaimana kita mendalami watak, menenggelamkan diri dalam dunia yg diceritakan dalam sesuatu novel, sejauh mana kita merasakan betapa watak-watak itu bernafas di dunia nyata, semuanya antara perkara-perkara yang membuatkan saya sangat suka bersendiri mengembara seketika ke kehidupan manusia lain melalui pembacaan.

Bacalah. Apa-apa isu dalam apa-apa bahasa sekalipun. Tak perlu sampai mencaci bahasa sendiri. Kalau mahukan cerita-cerita yang 'standard tinggi', cubalah bertanya-tanya, atau cari sahaja di internet. Baca review buku di goodreads atau thereadingroom.



Saya sayang bahasa melayu. Bahasa yg saya membesar dengannya. Sungguhpun anda tidak sayang, satu pesanan saya, hindarilah mencaci. Bukan setakat dalam isu membaca, tapi segala isu. Kita bukan mulia, meskipun kita mulia, siapa kita untuk mencaci mengeji melontarkan kata-kata kesat? Ada bezanya antara kritikan dan kutukan. Kalau memang tak suka atau tak berminat, pendamkan saja dalam hati. Dan tinggalkan.

Mungkin anda memang peminat tegar novel inggeris, tapi apa salahnya, sekali-sekala belek-belek buku cerita kita, dalam bahasa kita.

Wallahua'lam.

"Do you ever finish a book and then close it sort of reverently and just hold it close to you for a moment

and then for a while you see the world a bit differently because you’re still half in and half out of that book." -quoted